Turning 40 is a Big Milestone
Beginning a new journey can be scary. Hell, it can be downright terrifying. Turning 40 can be considered a new journey. A journey that eventually leads to your demise. Whoa, that got morbid quick. All joking aside, turning 40 is a big milestone, huge milestone, a gigantic milestone, go ahead and insert whatever adjective you like. It’s a big f’ing deal.
As I embark on what I am considering the second part of my life, I wanted to share the top 5 of the most important things I learned. It’s probably my fatherly instincts that are kicking in to give some advice to those that may be starting their 20’s or 30’s. I want to provide a way to let them know that life is going to be crazy, but most importantly you’re going to be okay.
#5 It's Okay to Cry
This is one hell of a piece of advice. MEN! It’s okay to cry. Heck, turning 40 may make you cry. Just realize, it doesn’t make you less manly if you cry. What you’ll learn is that it feels good to cry. It feels awesome to let all those motions out. I had great parents who taught me it’s okay to cry but for some that had deadbeat, loser parents who wanted their son to be a man and crying is not manly well they can go f off. I tried to write this more professionally, but I don’t think those type of personalities deserve the professional side of me.
As I embark on what I am considering the second part of my life, I wanted to share the top 5 of the most important things I learned. It’s probably my fatherly instincts that are kicking in to give some advice to those that may be starting their 20’s or 30’s. I want to provide a way to let them know that life is going to be crazy, but most importantly you’re going to be okay.
#4 You will have Embarassing Moments
Oh god, the stories I could tell. There are going to be multiple times in your life that you are going to be embarrassed. I am not talking about you stubbing your toe. I am talking about the time that you pooped yourself in public. No, that didn’t happen to me, well sort of but that is a story for a different time. There will be situations that when you think about later in life still makes you cringe. But speaking of letting go of past items that make you cringe please proceed to item #3.
#3 Past is the Past
No, this is not a cliché or a fancy quote I can put on Instagram, it’s the truth. The whole truth, and nothing but the truth. While this part took me a long time to comprehend, your past is not who you are today. It’s not who you are yesterday. All your past moments whether good or bad are the building blocks that has morphed you into the awesome human you are today. Now you can go ahead and use that as a quote for your Instagram post.
#2 Go to Therapy
OF A MAN! Therapy is the greatest thing since sliced bread, sorry that is sort of a cliché. There’s a lot of things that go on in your life. A lot. You need the time to express those emotions and sometimes it’s best to do that in a safe space. Lucky for me I found a therapist who was there for me during the highest anxious, insomnia, depressed moments of my life. Besides my family, she was an important piece of getting me back on track and living a full life. Without her I know I would have been lost.
#1 Do Not be Hard on Yourself
I really wish they invent a time machine so people can take it back and tell themselves that while life has some great moments, there will be some that are just downright ugly. Life is going to suck sometimes. Trust me, it’s going to suck. Losing my mother-in-law, finding out my Dad has cancer, and getting fired sucked all stank. I can tell you without a shadow of doubt there are so much more good moments than bad ones when you look back. Finding the love of my life, the birth of my two kiddos, working for an incredible company are some examples of how the incredible outshined the dreadful.
To sum everything up, you are a great person. You may not be taught that, you may experience past things that will not make you feel it, you may get embarrassed, or you might be holding all those emotions in. But just remember, you are the perfect you. Do not be hard on yourself, you do not deserve it. Why? Because the lessons I have learned the past 39 years has taught me that. Turning 40 is not so scary after all. On to the next journey. Here’s to 40 more.
